click on K.e.n.d.r.a. to navigate
have fun.. haha
Wednesday, January 31, 2007 my second post in the day within a few minutes. Hmm. was kind of "inspired" by Mrs Ang to jot down feelings about the last day of January. hahaha. how random.
Last day of January... It feels like i've been through 2 or 3 months already. Thinking about it, so much has happened and 2007 started so eventful-y. haha. Some of you may not know what has happened, but i don't wish to type it out here hahahahaha. So you can just go on guessing :P
anyway, 31st of January. I remembered from the 1st of January. The time when we did a small countdown in the Sanctuary during Prayer Meeting. although there wasn't champagne, there wasn't fireworks, there wasn't foam... there was still the joy of a new year, a new beginning. Haha. Hugging friends and shaking hands felt great. And right after that, things started tumbling down. Things happened one after another, some things really changed all of a sudden, some remained.
It's only a month, for goodness sick.
May You be my strength, dear Lord
Alright. I think i'm the weakest loser ever. haha. I didn't go to school twice in two weeks. I didn't go to school yesterday cause i was down with flu. at first it was just sore throat and headache... Then i slept... and slept... and SLEPT for the whole day. Was supposed to go see the doctor in the morning but i was too lazy to. hahaa. so i continued on SLEEPING and watching tv (since there wasn't homework to do). I measured my body temperature once before i went down to the doctor... actually, it was hours before i went down, but ANYWAY, it was 37.3 degrees. i thought i was fine... then, wheni went down to Dr. Tan, he measured... "you've got a fever you know..."
"Kendra, you're down with f-l-u and throat infection" ah. i see. so interesting. So yea. i've got an mc for yesterday and today. but i chose to go to school cause i couldn't afford to miss lessons. how dumb of me to think of that when i've spent the 1st 3 periods in the sickbay sleeping -_-" I should might as well have rested at home haha. My body's aching again... my head is starting to ache alittle... and i've got to do quite a few A Maths sums and prepare for tomorrow's History test. lalala.
oh. haha. i woke up at 3.15 today and i'm not feeling tired at all. i must be crazy. i woke up to find that my body was aching and i was starting to cough. how great. As i wasn't coughing yesterday, Dr Tan didn't give me any medicine for cough and phlegm.. hmm.. and i now sound horrible. :/
oh.. and chinese new year is really FLYING TOWARDS US. goodness, everybody seems to be busy with spring cleaning and buying of clothes and buying chinese new year goodies and eating them and i'm here down with a flu. -_- as it's so near already and i haven't bought any new year clothes yet, my mom is trying to squeeze some time into our schedule to go grab some clothes tomorrow.haha. i can't wait.
alright. i don't really know if this post is making any sense... my brain isn't working well today... haha.
Monday, January 29, 2007 something really struck me during sunday school yesterday. Why do i believe in God? why do i choose to go to church, go to sunday school, go for youth service? why? as a child, i was brought by my parents to church so i never really thought about it. it somehow has evolved into a routine... going to church on sundays. And because of that reason, i never really wanted to ask myself why i went to church. I always had those questions... why why why? Yet i never wanted to go search for the reason. i never wanted answers to those questions. Sometimes i'm so afraid that the answer is "because my parents believe, i believe" or "because my parents told me to go, so i go" and etc.
However, this time, i'd start searching. i'd continue searching for the answers.
What about you? why do you believe?
Saturday, January 27, 2007
i'm sorry. please pardon this post. i need to rant quite abit before volcano kendra erupts.
you stupid blah! there's so much to life! why are you making your life so miserable? do you know that you're making the one you "love" miserable too? can't you see that she's so different from last time? stop zi4 bei1-ing for goodness sick when you don't even want to change. goodness. GROW UP
and you! traitor. i can't believe that you're the way you are now. i thought you were different. thanks for adding COLOURS to my life
and YOU. YES YOU. i don't really know what to say to you. but sometimes, it's really so intimidating to talk to you. yeah. talking to you changed me. it gave me alittle more courage to speak. but... it's still so hard. i always feel so stupid when i talk to you. GAH.
and to BLAH yes. i've changed. everybody's changed. nobody's the same. i can't remain as high as i am last time. I can't remain as that kendra 2 years ago. PEOPLE DO CHANGE. stop expecting so much from me. i hate putting on that mask that i've to put each and every day i see you. "are you okay?" "i'm just being concerned" yes. i know that i'm blessed to have people being concerned with me but sometimes... "are you okay?" wouldn't make me speak out my own mind. so STOP BUGGING ME.
and to YOU YOU YOU. thanks for changing my life. those hurting words on your blog is enough. that mask that you put on to make me feel better doesn't help at all. you've made me lose my trust in everybody. you said that it sucks that the closest people around you betray you. think about it again. you've betrayed somebody who once labelled you as a "close" somebody. go on. go and hurt yourself somemore. GO! BYE!
yes. and for you who's reading. don't ask me who i'm aiming. don't ask me what happened. don't ask me anything i'm fine after ranting already. Good night world.
Go on asking... go on guessing. for all i care. "i'm just concerned" thanks for being concerned. whatever.
Thursday, January 25, 2007
"I was telling molina that i'm so urg-ed being teased. Guess what she said. ... ... "but.. it's not your fault la. you're just so.. tease-able" I shall take that as a compliment. THANKS SO MUCH. "
I remembered posting this last year. This year, my partner's saying the same thing too. "you'd have so much fun sitting beside Kendra. haha. cause she's so fun to make fun of!" and she's been trying to "make fun" of me the whole of today again. RAH.Cheryl Yeo's mad >.<
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
Haha. Had lunch at the market with Mabel and Si Hui just now. Goodness, we were there from 2.15pm till 5.30pm. hahaha. And we were talking and talking about all random stuff. But it was really a great time being with these two girls. haha. madness. i think we laughed and talked too loud at times... eh. hmm. haha. And GAH. i got teased by them too. -_-" gah.
Hmm. After talking to them, i just realised that there are really ugly side to things in life. I've never thought that any of us of this age will face those ugly sides... oh well. At least we've got friends to share it with :) thanks for sharing. hahahahha.
It's the middle of the week! WEDNESDAY. I cannot. CANNOT. wait till the week ends... And we'd be one step nearer to chinese new year! Ha!
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Poor cheryl sprained her knee during P.E. today. It was really really bad... you should have seen how she ran and fell... her legs looked really wobbly and THERE she went... dislocating her knee... that reminds me of Matthew telling me how his knee was dislocated and had to be admitted into the hospital and all the :S things which i hated hearing... ... but i don't think/hope Cheryl's knee's dislocated... It seemed to have been fixed back to the original place but eh, obviously she's not fine... she went to the doctor with Caroline after school.
Oh.. i think she wouldn't be coming to school tomorrow. Poor girl. Well, i admire her courage of trying to straighten her leg and walk and bla... i would have just sat there and cry and probably want to go home. Or... i would have fainted (HAHA. and sat on a wheelchair :P) or... i'd rather die than... feel the pain.
That reminds me that i'm actually so weak in nature. I've always admired people who were independent, who were brave to face whatever that's happened to them. No matter how hard i've been trying, i just can't seem to be like them. Like that stupid small cut on my toe, i cried like mad cause Joel threatened to put qing1 cao3 you2 on it... And like some stupid stress that i face just during Exam periods and i'd just isolate myself and tears will ROLL OUT... And i remembered telling somebody that i have zero tolerance for pain. so just one little cut and i'd think it's painful.. imagine me having my arms or legs dislocated. goodness. hahahaha. i cannot imagine how i'd react.
I'd stick to passing out. Ha.
Monday, January 22, 2007 i'm posting yet another random post...
i've got a laptop! HAHA. Now i need people to send me songs again... Anybody?
i'm an ordinary girl living an eventful life. i thank God for that :D
i miss you...
What happens to Kendra Ang when she's deprived of her beauty sleep 1. Tends to eat more 2. Tends to crave for coffee and chocolate and yoghurt and... etc. (food) 3. Start to have back aches at certain times of the day 4. Tends to ask teachers stupid questions - like what i did to Mr Seow today.. i asked him if he's been to the Matchmaker- SDU before during SS. Sorry Mr Seow... 5. Tends to get tickled easily 6. Tends to lose her temper easily ... her mind goes blank
thanks for reading. Good bye.
Sunday, January 21, 2007
It's great to open your eyes to see that the sun's shining. yeah! God is Good! Mmm... well, i didn't exactly open my eyes at 7 plus in the morning for the first time after a night long's sleep to see the sun... I actually woke up at 530 and went back to sleep again -_-" my body clock's working too well...
It's a sunday. and i have mixed feelings in me. Part of me is excited for the day, another part of me is sighing as tomorrow's a monday. I know, i've been saying that school's great and i enjoy school everyday and all those positive things... but i just can't help but dread the thought of going to school. A day of 7 hours in school is pretty sickening. The thought of it just turns me off. Besides, the homework is starting to pile up (and yes, i'm still here blogging and not finishing it..) and CCA starts and Family Night is like, so near and stuff... I'm starting to fear... :S
but... i guess... i'd have to always look forward and stay positive. yep... ... ... ...
Oh well, orange cat (HAHA) just reminded me today that it's 2 more weeks to chinese new year. 2 weeks! YES! MY INCOME IS COMING IN. Seems like time is really flying... on a concord maybe.. ANYWAY, i'm going to look forward to Chinese New Year. Yep.
come holiday come...
i feel like i'm just an invisible being trying to get the attention i want. and i seriously hate it. i hate it when i feel like i'm just an attention seeker whom people detest. i understand why you want to be invisible. i want to be invisible too
Friday, January 19, 2007 infatuate 1. to inspire or possess with a foolish or unreasoning passion, as of love. 2. to affect with folly; make foolish or fatuous. –adjective 3. infatuated. –noun 4. a person who is infatuated.
love 1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. 3. sexual passion or desire. 4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart. 5. (used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love? 6. a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour. ... ...
So... is hers infatuation or love? :P (words in red for reason HAHAHAHAHA :P )
Thursday, January 18, 2007
i'm becoming fatter and fatter day by day... feeling hungry practically almost all the time... eating.. almost all the time GAH. i'm getting fat! And the weather sucks. it definitely isn't encouraging for jogging. I hope the weather would get better on saturday. I WANT TO PLAY CAPTAIN'S BALL.
My brain juices were used up by maths and chinese today. As i took MC yesterday, i had tons of Maths and A Maths questions to complete and Lao shi suddenly said that she'd want us to write Ying4 yong4 wen2 without any aid. I think i wrote alot of crap cause I used up all my brain juices for Maths and A Maths that i just went blank when i saw the boxes on the paper. alright, at least i've finished it in time.
Lao shi gave back our zhou ji and she commented. Goodness, i didn't dare to read the comments. hahaha. i was really afraid that she'd comment about my ugly handwriting and how illogical my zhou jis sounded and stuff. but alright. i picked up the courage to scan through. hahaha.
I'd better go start on Social Studies assignment now. (something that almost nobody has started on) it's due tomorrow. And i honestly have no idea of what we're required for this assignment. Except that we've got to write on Governance. Right. And besides Social Studies, i've got Maths and A maths and chinese waving "hi" at me...!
I wasn't able to post on the blog yesterday but i'd try to now.
To my dear friend: i know you've got upset with what happened during HCL. but just take a moment to think again. Isit reasonable to just "hate" the teacher just because she didn't believe you? If you were to put yourself in her shoes, wouldn't you have also penalised both parties? The teacher isn't "god". she wouldn't know if you have cheated with the other person or not... especially when it's the beginning of the year. She doesn't even "know" us well. How would she know that you're the honest one and the other person isn't? I understand that you hate people who cheat, you hate people who don't believe you... Of course, that person IS at fault.. and of course... i know that even I myself would get upset for getting a zero for the first assignment.
but... should you get SO upset just for this little thing? should you start hating YET ANOTHER teacher for not believing in you when she doesn't even know you well? Cool down and think logically my friend.
Tuesday, January 16, 2007 School's been pretty alright so far. Although i still dread going to school in the morning, i thank God for the enjoyable time in school. I was told that we only have 24 hours every day and we'd have to make good use of the time that we have, to manage our time to study and stuff... I remember dreading the time in school for the first week, hoping to end school as early as we can. I still dread the time in school in the morning, hoping that my teachers wouldn't come to school and just have time to sleep or slack or whatever... but everytime when it's the last lesson, time suddenly seem to have flown past.
I really, really do like my class. haha. (though it is super noisy at times...) I think my classmates are really... interesting. hahahahahhaha.
We've got a new transferred classmate from Nan Hua High called Jessica Ko. I thought she would be really shy to talk and stuff... but when she started talking... wow. haha. She does try her best to be friendly and she isn't shy to tell a person whom she's met in 5 minutes that she's feeling lonely. Hmm.
Alright. time really flies. haha. it's near the middle of the week already! :D:D:D I can't wait till time flies to February. I can't wait till Chinese New Year to get my "income". hahaha.
haha. miss you too
Sunday, January 14, 2007
From an email...
ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want. FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it. FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye. SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married. SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight. EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much. NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely. TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling. ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives. TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly. THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?" FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk. FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze. SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson ............. SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and responsibility for all your actions.
EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it. TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice. TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Went to watch the musical, My Fair Lady, with my family today. I pretty much understood the storyline and what was happening as i've watched the show on DVD before. It's pretty interesting and it makes me think about the society.
The story was set in the 19th century and as you may know, they have a class system.
The father of Eliza (the main character) is a drunkard from not a very high class society who loves to drink... duh. haha. And he said that he doesn't want to be of the middle class and he doesn't like to the people from the Middle Class. It sounds weird doesn't it? Normal people who are of a lower working class would strive their best to be of a higher class, to be respected by the higher class society. However, he chose not to be and didn't even WANT to be.
As the story proceeds, he is given a sum of money and was recommended to be a manager or some sort in a bank/some respectable company and he became richer all of a sudden. Many people would have been happier when they've earned more than enough money for survival and able to marry and etc etc. However, he was reluctant and even cursed the person who recommended him to the company. He didn't like to be of the middle working class. He didn't like to have so much money with him. He wasn't comfortable. He was happier when he had lesser money...
Then, to Eliza. She was a flower girl at the beginning of the show. She had a horrible accent and she couldn't pronounce and speak proper English. to her, ae=ai, ou=ow... However, she went to take phonics lessons with Mr Henry Higgins (mind my spelling. i didn't check the spelling of his surname) and she was taught to be a fine young lady. compared to her un-ladylike manner in the past. she, however, started to feel lost and not what to do after mastering the skills of "Being A Lady". She somehow lost her identity. She didn't know what to do after she's completed her lessons. She was afraid that she wouldn't have anything to do.... She'd rather go back to be that poor and uncouthed flower girl.
Why? It just makes me think. Why are we complaining about what we have when others actually try so hard to get what we want? Have we become so comfortable with our "misfortune" that we'd rather give up the opportunity of being more "fortunate"?
What do humans want, exactly?
i still want to sing...
You are my sunshine my only sunshine you make me happy when skies are grey you never know dear how much i love you please don't take my sunshine away... ...
Friday, January 12, 2007
It's the last day of school for the week! yes! finally. hahaha. Have been dreading to go to school this whole week... Although i enjoyed school pretty much. I really thank God that He has put me in a class that is really different from the class i was in the past 2 years. Although i'm not exactly really close to my classmates yet, i've actually enjoyed being in the same class as them. They might be alittle crazy at times, some are arrogant, some might be noisy and talkative, some might be loud, some might be... probably too friendly... Alright. too friendly i'm just being cautious..
But i think 3M'07 really rocks. For now. hahahaha. I thank God that i'm sitting besides somebody whom i've NEVER known and NEVER talked to and NEVER heard anything about her before. That allowed me to not judge and to sincerely be friends with her. Being beside her is seriously fun. hahaha. She's so easy-going that she makes people comfortable around her. I've got another partner who's sitting alittle distance away from me who's suddenly become so friendly that i got alittle frightened. hahaha. I heard of her reputation ... :S but oh well. haha. I shan't judge her by what people say but get to know her :D
Thank God also for my teachers. At least i'm not complaining about my MATHEMATICS TEACHERS or anything. haha. I like my teachers. seriously. Especially my maths teachers. i'm probably too used to Mrs Poh's way of teaching and probably alittle too used to getting tensed during Maths, i feel alittle hard to get used to my current teachers' way of teaching. I suddenly feel so relaxed. HAHA. And i'm glad that i've got my history teacher as my history teacher. She teaches not only History... but many many other things :) i've only had 2 lessons with her. haha.
Alright. In conclusion. GOD IS GOOD. Life IS beautiful...! Always look on the bright side of life... ...
Thursday, January 11, 2007
We did DISC Personality test AGAIN on tuesday and i went to check my results just now. HAHA. SCI. :D i'm still the same as last year when i took it. Interesting. haha
Still, i'm still high S. hahaha. I remembered Amanda Ongko telling me that she doesn't want to be a High S person cause it seems so boring. Oh well, i love my combination of SCI. hahaha. :D
THE PARADOX OF OUR TIME IN HISTORY
The paradox of our time in history is that : We have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; Wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints; We spend more, but have less; We buy more, but enjoy it less. We have bigger houses and smaller families; More conveniences, but less time; We have more degrees, but less sense; More knowledge, but less judgment; More experts, but more problems; More medicine, but less wellness.
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life; We've added years to life, not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, But have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor. We've conquered outer space, but not inner space; We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul; We've split the atom, but not our prejudice. We have higher incomes, but lower morals; We've become long on quantity, but short on quality.
These are the times of tall men, and short character; Steep profits, and shallow relationships. These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; More leisure, but less fun; More kinds of food, but less nutrition. These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; Of fancier houses, but broken homes. It is a time when there is much in the show window And nothing in the stockroom; A time when technology can bring this letter to you, And a time when you can choose either to make a difference Or just hit delete.
Monday, January 08, 2007
I just read Sar sar's blog post about the sec ones and i really find that the secondary ones are pretty snobbish and... i should say ... brave. HAHA.
Was having combined chapel as usual this morning. While Pastor Wendy was speaking to us and about to give us the Benediction, a song suddenly started playing. A rather big sized secondary one girl stood up and walked calmly past her classmates "sorry, excuse me. sorry" and out she went! out of the hall. yeah. her phone was ringing. "Gwen Stefani somemore!" You must have seen the faces from my class (who was apparently sitting next to their class). 0_0. Grace's jaws nearly dropped to the ground. I looked at wei leng and she looked back at me. "that girl's going to die..." "that girl's so dead..."
It would be alright if she sat at the back of the hall or at least in the middle of the hall. She was sitting RIGHT BEHIND Ms Kon and Mrs Yap and the principals. -_- wow. "she could have at least turned it to the silent mode or something..."
Oh well. I must say that she was really cool about it. hahaha. she went out to answer the call. hahahahaha. OH! and one thing to add that might cause her death. Mrs Poh's her form teacher...
Hmm. Let's see. the girl must have been counselled by Mrs Yap already. haha.
Decided to come home early today to take a rest and then do some reading before school starts tomorrow. wow. Kendra suddenly sounds so mugger-ish... haha. I'm just trying to strive harder this year. Ehh... at least for the first month of the year. hahahaha.
Besides coming home to read, i've mentioned that i wanted to take a rest. Yep. Decided to take a rest before i break down again -_-" Not like i'm starting to feel stressed or anything...just... hmm... it's better to be safe than sorry. HAHA. so i've decided to rest more to be prepared for the challenges ahead.
haha. i sound so fake. nevermind.
Hmm. The headache's going on and off nowadays. it's really... ... bad. Seriously bad. Hmm. HAHA. i remember telling my friend that i probably have a tumour or cancerous cells in my brain thus the headaches and I might die soon. hahahahaha. okay... i don't think so la. Maybe i'm just weak. OH. or maybe i have low blood pressure (wahaha) or low sugar level etc. Maybe i'm going blind...I heard that when your eyes have some problem or some sort, you'd get headaches. hahaha.
Okay. enough of my crap. Shall go read the first chapter for Chemistry (as we're told). :D
:( it really affects me.i can't help but think that i'm too... ....
Saturday, January 06, 2007 My mood's swinging up and down again. and it seriously sucks.
I can't even remember why i was so high yesterday and know why i'm so low today. Grr. Sucks sucks sucks. People tell me that it's a choice to be happy or not. i'm sorry. i chose to be the latter today. I suck i know.
My head's aching like mad. I feel like crap.
I feel so sick of life all of a sudden. I don't feel like doing anything. I just feel like lying on the bed and just slack my day away. And HAHA. I just told myself that thoughts of "life sucks" is all in the mind. You'd have to have the right attitude towards life. Right.
I think i'm falling sick. The headache can seriously kill me..
I feel so blur about what has happened all of a sudden. I can't think. I CANT THINK. RAH.
I want to go walk again. :( I haven't walked around Singapore yet...
I want to grow up. I can't wait to complete O levels... COME EXAMS COME. May the year pass quickly and smoothly.
I think i've been really selfish nowadays. I haven't been praying for the things around me. I think i'm quite outdated. I haven't been reading or watching news.
I can't handle it. I CANT HANDLE IT. RAH.
Alright. Above is the evidence of Kendra being random. And the randomness is making my headache even more. :/
Friday, January 05, 2007 shoo! School life's been good. And i think it'd get better! YEAH! :D
Although i still dread quite abit when it comes to lessons... I'm actually starting to learn to enjoy each lessons. Having new teachers who have never taught me before are quite interesting and i'm super glad that I have the teachers whom I have this year. haha. It's going to be an exciting year!
Went to the NUS Cultures of Creativity Exhibition today to know about the Nobel Prize winners and how it has come about and stuff. It was pretty interesting. Having not know what Nobel Prize is about although i hear it like almost every year, i'm glad that we're given the opportunity to go see the exhibition.
Was partnering Heidi and Wei Leng today. I have never really "partnered" Wei Leng and Heidi before and i thought it would be quite awkward. However, they were really great to be with :D And I envy Heidi's 101% of self-confidence in herself. Like, example, saying confidently that she would one day win the Nobel Prize awards... About having earned alot of money as she's going to be successful next time and retire at 45 and be a writer after she's retired and stuff. HAHA. She seriously wasn't joking. Although she sounded like she was bragging and stuff, i still admire her courage to be so... ... confident. haha.
Something that Heidi asked really triggered me today. Besides asking about why Jesus didn't go to China and saying that "if Jesus lived till now, He would have taken the aeroplane to China.... ... He might visit Singapore..." (-_-), she asked me questions about the Bible which i somehow felt difficult to answer. It then reminded me that... Hey, i should really read more of the Bible in order to answer those questions correctly...
Oh, I walked back home from Ang Mo Kio MRT Station today. I'm proud of myself :D :D
Thursday, January 04, 2007 "How's school?" "Eh. alright la..."
I typed a pretty long post about school just now in the afternoon. and. TA DA~~~~~ it's either the internet or blogger had some problem. Therefore, MY POST IS NOT SAVED OR PUBLISHED. 气死人了. RAH
i shall post about school sometime again.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
God spoke speaks. He did this morning. the first thing in the morning. He spoke to me once again.
Remember my new year resolution to love? hahaha. you can refer to the previous post la... Anyway. Yep. My first resolution was to love.
This morning, at 5, during QT, i opened up the long-time-no-seetouch devotional book and flipped to where i have stopped. (which was in November 2006) "The Real Love" Woahh... I was quite shocked to see it. Have been reading blogs... many people are somehow facing some friendship problems or problems with themselves of trusting their friends and stuff. I remember that right after i read the certain person's blog, i went to the YF Portal and Jasper has also blogged about friendship. I shan't post what he has posted... You can go read the YF Portal Blog here!
Anyway, back to during QT. The Real Love. It wasn't about BGR like what MOST OF YOU WOULD HAVE THOUGHT IT WAS. (-_-) It was about giving a part of you to those around you. Somehow, it was like a part 2 to the friendship thing that i read from the YF Portal. It was like a reminder. To show genuine love to those around me. To show care and kindness to those whom i may think are.. ... ... :/
I remembered that a speaker during the LTC said before "if somebody has a problem with you, the problem is not you but that person." If i have a problem with some person, it means that the problem is with me.. but not that some person.
"God didn't simply give us a plan for eternal life; He gave His one and only Son - the biggest part of Himself He could give. And Jesus didn't simply give you a prayer to memorize; He gave His blood. What are you giving to those around you?"
Tuesday, January 02, 2007 ARGH. School's starting tomorrow!!! My phobia's coming back.. ... :S All the uncertainties... the fear... ... etc etc are crawling up to my brain. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
"I DON'T WANT SCHOOL"
After 2 whole months of serving, going out, sleeping, growing fat (:/), playing, slacking... ... i'm finally going back to school. Secondary 3. I'm going to be sec 3... Time really flies... and i really am not prepared yet. I told myself that things are going to change for the better. Yeah. i hope so.
People have been posting their new year resolutions. Hmm. let me post mine.
1) Love. - the people around me. especially my new class... :S 2) Humility. - when serving especially :) 3) Always look on the bright side of life (whistles) 4) Face challenges bravely 5) Set a time for QT - something that i have neglected during the holidays. 6) LOSE WEIGHT - okay. ignore me.
I guess that's it. I can't think of anything else le. Heh. I admire how you handle things. :)
Monday, January 01, 2007
>i look back. at 12 am, 1st jan 2006. I called you to say "happy new year" :) you said that you were really surprised (that's pretty out of point). it's a pity that we don't really have much to talk about already. It was almost 2 years of friendship. what isit now? acquaintan-ship?
One day, you shall see. I'd run. I'd run away. I'd run to somewhere far. Really far. Somewhere where nobody would know me. Somewhere where people can't find me. Maybe running's not fast enough. I'd save up to get an air ticket. grab some money from my parents and fly to somewhere foreign...
Yeah. I can sense it near already. One day. Just one day. You'd see.
i now understand why that certain person chose to disappear. and i have to say reluctantly that... we both are alike. :/