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Friday, March 31, 2006
I really want to lose weight. Really, really, REALLY want to lose weight.
I serious. I'm either going to run during recess, or before school starts... I'm going to stop eating chocolates and deep fried food! I shall have self-control over what i eat and when i eat!!!
ARGH! Why HOW on earth did i put on so much weight in only 3 months!! SUCKS!

Talking about 3 months,
I've survived 3 months of school. Thank God for pulling me through 3 months of year 2006! haha... I think i made it sound like my life was terrible... Ok, it wasn't that terrible. haha. It was just... full of tests and they're tiring me out... but with God's Strength, I got through them! YEAH!

I wanted to type something. But i forgot.
Oh. CLDDS. Yes, i finally went for CLDDS today. And as my first time at the practice for the skit, I'm put as one of the actresses acting for the competition. Boy am i scared... We'd be representing our school and if I forget what i'm supposed to do or say... :O i'd be dead!! ARGH!
However, i still want to thank you cldd-ies for your encouragements :D. We'd work hard together ya! :D

Hmm... I see Kendra Changing again... And i'm still wondering what was the cause for that. HaHA.

21:17
*kendra :D

****** Thursday, March 30, 2006
I want to change you...the words you use, the mindset you have... i want to change them because you're just like a sister to me. Yet i don't even know how to change you. I don't know how i can convince you to change...
I know, pray and pray and pray. But sometimes, it's frustrating seeing a person whom you really care about fall deeper and deeper and doesn't even seem to be climbing out of that well. And you're just standing looking down not knowing how to help. This feeling really sucks. I really hate it. I know, pray and leave it to God. but... ...

GRR! I don't know! I feel so tired!

Our Class is in a dieting mood this week! Everybody seem to be trying to loose weight.haha... Yeah! Great motivation! We shall loose weight as a class ya? then by October, we'd all be anorexic. :P. JK! hahahahha... Oops, i forgot there are people who want to gain weight. HAHA...so by October, we'd either be underweight or Overweight!
Ok...that's not good... Hey, i'm just kidding ok!

Hmm, it's funny that talking BGR can actually bring you closer to a friend whom you've never been close to. Haha.


21:19
*kendra :D

****** "Hey... how's everything?"
" Hey... what are you doing?"
" Hey... are you free to talk now?"
" Hey... are you ok?"
" Hey... how's life?"
" Hey... How are you?"
" Hey... I'm bored...what are you doing?"
" Umm... are you busy?"

21:07
*kendra :D

****** Wednesday, March 29, 2006
should i even be one?
i don't want to commit into anything else already. although it may be a learning experience, i know that it may not be easy and may take up even more of my time.
However, i really do want to try wearing that tie and being like one.............. haha...

Had two free periods today! And i talked for 1 hr 30 mins... boy, is my throat sore now.haha.

It's finally Thursday tomorrow! YES!
Come, Weekends, come!

21:26
*kendra :D

****** Monday, March 27, 2006
yay! Thank God that everything's over now!
It was SO easy yet i thought it would be super difficult and everything will be worse...
hahaha...
I think i think too much at times... (see? I think again.. haha)
I've learnt something from this again! To always depend on God and never worry :D
No matter how bad you think the situation will be, have Faith in Him! Nothing is impossible! Yep!

Summary of School for today:
- Mrs EHEM wasn't in school today (1 free period! YESSsss!)
- Wrote 2 letters
- Bad hair day...!
- slept (again) during Art.. heee
- was inspired to write encouragement notes...

Gosh, revising for Bio test tomorrw now... Sexual Reproduction in Human Beings... :S
the pictures really make me feel like puking... I'm not exaggerating.......

17:35
*kendra :D

****** Saturday, March 25, 2006
Was in a super crappy mood today.
Cried a few times in the bus to myself... :S
sorry, if i've dao you people, i didn't really mean it... :)

I just found out today that, i can be real pessimistic! haha... i have been thinking and crying like siao today... Quite stupid right. haha...
Ok lar, i shall stop being so angry/sad/irritated.
I shall go back to the happy Kendra... haha..

Happy, happy Kendra...

21:18
*kendra :D

****** Friday, March 24, 2006
Isit part of growing up to have internal struggles with yourself? Or isit just me?


23:59
*kendra :D

****** Thursday, March 23, 2006
I'd always see Mabel writing letters almost everyday and
I normally wonder what she writes in there... Does she confide in her friends about her troubles? Or just an encouragement note? Hmm... maybe both...
Anyway, She's just giving me that urge to write to as many people as i can write to! haha...

I don't know. I feel lonely sometimes... There's hardly anybody whom i can confide in except God i guess. Ok lar, i know that it's not that people don't want to listen to me, but it's because i don't trust anybody. And i actually don't even understand why i don't want to trust people... even the friend whom i've known for... 7 years? I don't know...
I'm always surrounded with people who are really talkative and are always telling me about their lives. And i always ask myself why i'm not like them... If i just say out whatever that's bothering me, like them, i may not have so much to think about... so much to wonder...
Haix... i don't even know what i'm typing about...


Anyway, ya, school has started. Has been quite a slack-y week... Chemistry test was postponed to the 3rd week of term 2... I've been enjoying Chinese lessons nowadays... haha... and English too. Yay. Subject lessons rock! I feel guilty again... i'm going to skip CLDDS again for Focus Group Discussion tomorrw! Manx, i feel really, really guilty for pon-ing CLDDS the other few times. I shouldn't have... Sigh.

I somehow miss going to SCKX's house! I don't know why... I still remember the first time i've been to her house. Haha... I'm starting to miss primary school life again...
During History lesson this morning, the primary school was having some talk and the primary girls were so noisy! Screaming and shouting! However, i somehow enjoyed their laughters... How i wish we also had such entertaining talks in Secondary school. I really would prefer to have a lame, high speaker conducting the talk than some not so interesting teacher teaching in class.

I'm so glad that it's friday tomorrow. Thank God for bringing me through this week :)

16:05
*kendra :D

****** Monday, March 20, 2006

Look! my clock's broken!!!

(And i broke it! AHH... i'm becoming like Minghui!!!haha...jk...)

Labels: photos

21:48
*kendra :D

****** Sunday, March 19, 2006
I'm getting fat... :S gosh... kept eating and eating non-stop! (AHH! PIG)

Going back to school tomorrw. I DONT WANT! This i-don't-want-school feeling sucks. have been having it since the week before the holidays. It's a stupid crappy feeling lah! GRR
My english sucks too! I think i've been using too much singlish and not speaking proper english, thus my english is deproving. I need help! somebody with good English, come speak to me and tune my English back to normal level!

I'm stuck with My literature assignment. I really do not know how to complete it. Shessh.. cause my vocab is super weak and i don't know how to describe! And my dad's always telling me to read more books. YA RIGHT! like that'd helped me alot. So what if i read? not like i'd go check the dictionary or always use that word right? Why don't you speak more to me with more cheem words instead of those simple words? GRrr...
Ok... i admit that i'm lazy to check the dictionary for the meaning of the words i don't know, but even if i do, i wldn't be able to digest so many right?

:S
Alright, shall stop all my irritating complains.
I shall go finish up literature.
Yep.
(help......................)

21:07
*kendra :D

****** Saturday, March 18, 2006
I shall do a summary of the retreat like ch-- y-! haha

• singspiration
• BBQ till about 11 plus?
• Gina and Bonnie's Fashion show at about 11 plus... 12? i can't remember (super funny!)
• Singspiration
• 2 truths 1 false game...
• Sharing ended at 5 plus...
• slept at 6 plus
• woke up at... 10 plus?
• most ate watermelon for breakfast...
• cleared up clubhouse
• finally went to eat brunch (at 12 noon)
• went to Mount Faber SAFRA to bowl!
• i pon-ed CLDDS again... (i'm so dead...Ready to get beaten by CAO laoshi )
• i'm the lousiest at bowling! WAHAHA!
• Got message "Kendra, have your dinner b4 you go home"... (sounded like i'm not allowed to go home earlier... :( )
• Finished at 3!

YaY! haha... Retreat was really great and slack-y! hahaha... :D

(c-----, stop punk-ing!!! GAHH!!!)

20:52
*kendra :D

****** Thursday, March 16, 2006
the toy i got from Yoshinoya! haha!
a flat faced......................... i still can't figure what it is... a pig? Hmm...

Labels: photos

13:46
*kendra :D

****** Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Went to Orchard with Carmen and Charissa this afternoon... Took my first neoprints in......................................................... many years..haha... Thanks for accompanying me today! haha! (i didn't buy anything! HAHA!!!!)

Feel really blessed... for having a sister like.. mine.
haha... Read her blog and suddenly feel so.................................i don't knw how to describe that feeling.. she's grown alot... and maybe even out grown me! (not HEIGHT!) As in... her Faith, Knowledge... etc.
Manx... she seem to be even more matured than me in many ways! haha.. i shall learn from her..

Anyway, thanks for liking the song on my blog :D I got my idea from Chaoyi's blog's song..hahahaha... JJ LIN!!!



21:59
*kendra :D

****** Tuesday, March 14, 2006
I was looking through the Straits Times yesterday and something caught my eye at the F.Y.I. page! I saw my name! I was somehow feeling so... WOW when......................

5 things you can do today
1. Meet Kendra, the guide dog of the president of the Independent Society of the Blind, and learn about the merits of using guide dogs and making Singapore a friendlier place for the dogs at symposium


WHAT???? A GUIDE DOG???!!!

13:01
*kendra :D

****** Monday, March 13, 2006
I feel discouraged.. I love my Grandma, yet i dislike her at times...
She's always giving comments that discourage me from doing things...
I hate it manx... sometimes i really ask myself why i tell her things. I should just zip my mouth. I cannot handle her comments at all. :(


I didn't say or do anything to you. Why do you dislike me so much? I'm not stupid. I can sense it.and i don't get it!

I really hate myself at times... for being "matured" for my age. Or always guessing and understanding people's thoughts. I'd rather be those irritating bimbos who are self-centered. .. Who'd just say whatever that comes out from their mouth without thinking and digesting ... ... ... .. ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... ........................

Hmm... Maybe not.



OK... i think it's just some hormone changes going on in my body... that's why i'm feeling low...
haha...
("cheer up, kendra. Cheer up")

19:28
*kendra :D

****** Sunday, March 12, 2006
I'm starting to feel alittle stressed by the amount of the projects i have... Actually, it's the SPCA project. I'm starting to question myself, "WHY DID I CHOOSE SPCA?".
The March Holidays are going to be tiring... Monday:School, project SPCA Tuesday:Shopping, Project TKAM Wednesday: not planned yet Thursday: Leaders' Retreat Friday:Leaders' Retreat, CLDDS
There! my only free day is wednesday... I doubt it'd be free though..have to do I not stupid too project..
Haix, I want to go out with my Mom! I miss going out with my mom... And i'm like always spending my time in church... Feel so guilty... hahaha...
I feel so tired...haven't been sleeping well for 3 nights... And i hate being tired... my face look so weird when i laugh or smile... :S hahahaha... and i talk crappy things that i don't even understand.

I don't feel like going to school anymore... i don't knw what to ask Mrs Ng... GAHH... But i need my homework file! I'm super blur larh...RAH! i'm feeling conky now... I need some sleep!!!! :S

21:58
*kendra :D

****** Friday, March 10, 2006
Family night was a huge success! Especially to 2o!! I mean, can you imagine, we've only started practising last week and did our last minute script just this week. Everybody was so stressed, not knowing how we're going to end up like and we were just..........................................
HOWEVER, 2o did it fantastically! (to me :D) Although the mikes weren't really good, the curtains were alittle... messy, Feather from feather boas dropped all around where we were, WE WERE STILL GOOD! Today was miraculous.I thank God for that! Our rehersals were actually done better than what we have done for the past two weeks... We even added curtains at the last minute yet we weren't really confused! haha!
oohlalaians, you ALL did well! The planning was horrible, people were horrible too.. haha.. But we did it! Despite all those horrible stuff before the rehersals! WOOHOO!!! Now i really see why seniors say that Family Night is fun... :)


SHOOTS! CL teacher is SO SO SO SO going to kill me... really. I ponned CLDDS for NOTHING and the drama teacher was super, duper angry. I'm going to be barbequed. So great... HOW??? I'm scared to face that teacher!!! WHY ON EARTH DID I PON CL? YOU'RE STUPID,KENDRA

23:27
*kendra :D

****** Thursday, March 09, 2006
I'm becoming fatter and fatter ler lar!!
I've just eaten 3 meals in the early part of the day!! SUCKS! Kendra's a PIG!!!
And stupidly, i went to weigh myself.. .I put on weight!!! GAH!!!
I'm pigging... pigging...pigging... :S

I'm going to go on a diet from the effect of tomorrw!


Ok, enough of my obsession about my weight. I'm feeling alittle stressed now.
4 projects to be done in 1 week. HOW???
Dear teachers, we are not robots, nor powerpuff girls and supergirls, neither are we magicians.
How do you expect us to finish so many projects during the March Holidays? We can't be like robots doing projects everyday, every minute... neither can we do magic and *ding* out a good piece of work for you.
Lit, Chinese, Maths, PW... xi...
PLUS, we have OTHER work to do...
Alright, i shall think on the bright side... At least we can sleep late and wake up late! ....
That's the only good thing i can think of for the March Holidays.

18:26
*kendra :D

****** Wednesday, March 08, 2006
I love to look at the clouds. It just gives me a wonderous feeling... :D




Anyway, Family Night is 2 days away! And i haven't thought of anything to wear yet! I don't have any retro stuff to wear lar... :S I shall go as modern then..hahaha...
Haix, how i wish i have cousins who live near me... or have an older sister who's crazy about fashion who tries out almost everything.. Oh well, i should be glad that i only have one crazy sister instead of 2. hahaha...

Haix...my grandma is starting to think that i'm fat again... she was telling me about exercising and blah blah blah while i was having dinner just now. Manx, maybe i should stop eating like a pig anymore...

My March Holiday resolution:
1) Go jogging twice a week
2) Stop junk-ing!
3) Finish reading atleast 1/2 of TKAM!
4) Study.. study... study.....
5) Practise Piano more frequently!

Progress Report:
English - B3
HCL - A1
Biology - B3
Chemistry - B3
Maths - A1
Geography - B4
History - B4
Literature - B4
Home econs - A1
Art and Craft - A2
Computer Studies - A2

Haha... no Cs! ehh... but it seems like i got more 4s than 1s... :S

NVM... I shall work harder next term :D
Currently: trying to attempt the Maths WS... (GAHHHHHHHH!!!!! )

20:11
*kendra :D

****** Monday, March 06, 2006
THERE! the nerdy poohs! adorable right??!!! :D :D :D
(but it's so expensive.. haix...)
i shall visit 7-eleven more often to see those poohs............................................... Ok, i think the staff there would think that i'm crazy or something..haha
Oh! who wants free sweets? My grandma's complaining about my sweets taking up too much space in the fridge... haha.. i shall be nice to give it to oohlalaians tomorrow then... ;)

Our God is an Awesome God, He reigns from Heaven above, With Wisdom, Power and Love, Our GOD is and AWESOME GOD!

Labels: photos

21:37
*kendra :D

****** Sunday, March 05, 2006
Things i found out today
1) the Bible actually recorded that the Earth's round! :D
2) Jolene has a funny laughter which is contagious
3) Ming Hui is as crazy as Ling Hui
4) Ming Hui's as ..... (don't knw how to describe) as Darryl
5) L-- Lao shi has been/is attending the same church as me! Since... many years ago! WAH (stupid that i didn't realise)
6) Tartar sauce + coke + Garlic chilli + ice = Ming Hui Salad sauce
7) I need to be super duper high and crazy at times
8) i'm a horrible, terrible, vegetable joker... (no lar.. i'm not vegetable.. i'm more meaty.. )
9) 7-eleven's selling Nerdy poohs! (who wants to buy for me? haha...)

22:55
*kendra :D

****** Saturday, March 04, 2006
Yes, i'm a spoilt brat, i need to be spoon fed (cause i'm a pig? sorry, crappping)... and you are slaves... HAPPY?
And i didn't step into your shoe to think for you. HA HA HA HA HA. I have tried ok... have you stepped into MINE and think for me? I'm having complains from both sides. You and the others. How am i supposed to feel? How am i supposed to balance my stand? You never heard many complains from them have you? I have! eVERYDAY! From all around me! They're just buzzing buzzing buzzing nonstop!!! And you? do you hear them? NO! YOU DONT! Nobody goes up to you to tell you straight at the face you knw... and what do they do? just start complaining to me!Like it would help in any way... and what can i do? Help them convey the message to you??? what do you want me to do? You just come to my tag board, flood it with complains plus insults... can i help u in any way? can you tell me? what shall i do? Why don't you step into my shoe and think for me? Imagine yourself facing the same situation as me? I'm already trying my best to satisfy you... and yet you're saying that you're satisfying us. What joke's that? If you're satisfying us? we'd already have changed another script, find other lead roles ect. Please lah... you're always insulting people, being so straight forward, telling people off. How would you feel when people do that to you? And sorry sometimes, really doesn't help. you have to learn to change. Everybody has to.

I'm so tired.

23:40
*kendra :D

****** Friday, March 03, 2006
OH MY GOSH!!!
I WAS SUPER MALU TODAY LAH!!!!!!!!

After Literature today, si hui and i went back to class, got our wallets and went to the canteen for "recess"...
After buying 2 bowls of Guo Tiao Tang, and after we bought our drink, i suddenly realised that something was wrong...
"why aren't the 2os having recess ah?" then i was like "isit supposed to be recess now?"
surprisingly, sihui said calmly,"MUSIC!"
I just :O and :O and :O
"AHHH!!! HOW? OH SHIT OH SHOOTS OH AHH!!!" i started panicking... GAHHH....
then Larine and Judith came running to us asking us "what are you doing here? it's music now!!!" Si hui and i were like.. "we know!!" Si hui wanted to finish her food... but i was feeling guilty enough and i didn't have appetite to eat anymore! So i just threw away half a bowl of guo tiao with fish fillet + egg+meat ball into the pail... Wasteful right? but i cldn't eat already lar! i would just vomit out whatever that i've tried to gobbled up.
Gosh... never in my WHOLE ENTIRE life have i been so blur lah! what's worst is that Mrs --- didn't book us!! WHY WHY WHY??? it makes us feel even more guilty!!!
haha... so when it was the REAL recess time, si hui and i went back to class and punished ourselves by walking alot.. hahaha... ok..that's crap.

OH manx!!! What was going on in our minds manx!! i think we were too hungry lar.. SHEESH.

Family night rehersal was bad... horrendous. Not that i want to pull down everybody's morale, but honestly, it was BAD. Actually, it was ok cause everybody cooperated on stage. However, once offstage, everybody were so tensed up, stressed up... i was just... I didn't know what to say... Honestly, i agreed with Heidi. And i disagreed with Mrs ----...
"If you're unhappy, just keep it to yourself! why say it out to make everybody unhappy?"
Ok... maybe she's well... "right" about saying that we shldn't make everybody unhappy... and as for what Heidi said, "Pathetic". I don't think it was wrong commenting... but, i guess if it's pathetic, shall we try to fix it to become un/in/non -pathetic?
Can we like think of a plan for the class to be more enthusiastic?More united? Our class is not in cliques, but it's so individualistic! Look at other classes! They are somehow united, at least those enthusiastic ppl step out to do something to lead the class...

"It's a learning process," my dad said just now. Yes, but are we learning from this Family Night performance? Or are we going to look back after this incident and start blaming people again when we're older, not getting to learn anything?

20:29
*kendra :D

****** Thursday, March 02, 2006
it was the first day of march yesterday.
and i have actually survived through two months of 2006... (wait, have i posted that already?)
it's finally going to be holiday time! WOOHOO!! FINALLY, can stop all those waking up at 5 kind of life... :S

Had Family Night rehersal today. I was the director. I feel... useless actually... Like, i cldnt control the class and i don't think i'm good at leading, telling them what to do... I feel like giving up my role but my mom always tells me not to give up half way... and she always tells me that "take it as a learning experience"...
If i go to my dad, he will say "what's the worst that can happen?"
haha...
Now i knw how it feels to be a teacher, trying to get a point across the class is difficult. but i really thank God for people who cooperates and are encouraging...

It was a beautiful day yesterday. I loved 1st of March 2006. I love the bright sun that got me alittle darker (actually, not much difference :P)... i just loved yesterday. Although i needed to study for History test, i was able to actually watch TV for like... more than an hour.. which i hardly find time to do (i'm normally online lah... hahahah).
To think about it, i'm actually quite obsessed with the internet. Hmm.. i'd better have some self-control... or i'd either be short sighted, or short term memori-ed... hahaha... manx... i'm starting to crap again.

Oh my, my room has become a home for insects... i've been killing insects like it's my job to. I hate it! I just saw a huge.................... I don't knw what.. an ant? Mosquito? some insect.

I feel so fat all of a sudden! I feel like i'm an inflated balloon!! HELP! I think i've been eating too much... :S and i was lazy to go jogging yesterday..how great... :S
It seems like everybody's gaining weight and are Trying to lose weight..haha... We should go on a diet together! Who's with me?:D

Thanks for calling that night... haha.. was quite shocked actually. Thanks anyway :D

22:11
*kendra :D

******

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